“I won’t go back to England without my son”

 

A sad black woman

 After the death of my parents and two siblings in a motor accident on their way back from my grandfather’s burial, it was as if the world had come to a standstill for me. It was just five days after I turned 12 years old. I could have been dead too but I must confess I am still alive by fate.

Uncle Stanley, my father’s younger brother, promised to send me to England to join his friend’s family. “Sabina, you need a change of environment. I am making arrangements for you to go and join my friend’s family in England,” he told me. Four months later, I was in England and gladly I started school. In no time, I was done with anything that has to do with school and started working. I sent Uncle Stanley money from time to time to support himself and his family.

One evening, after work hours, I headed for the lift. As I got closer, the lift door opened and I saw this dark, tall man starring at me while I entered. When we got to the ground floor, he introduced himself as Dabo. I introduced myself as Sabina. His company was just two floors above mine. After that day, we had a couple of lunch and dinner dates. We dated for a year and with the approval of his family and my uncle we had a quiet wedding ceremony with only a few Nigerian friends in attendance, precisely in 2008. I gave birth to Junior in June 2009. I am four months pregnant with our second child.

In December 2011, we decided to come home and spend Christmas with Dabo’s mother. He is the first child and only son of his parents. He has two younger sisters, Gina and Queen. The plan was to spend a month and return to England. While I was indifferent about coming, however, Dabo was so excited because the last time he stepped into Nigeria was 10 years ago. The only joy I had coming home was to see Uncle Stanley and his family after 18 years.

When we arrived at the Muritala Muhammed International Airport, we were welcomed by Dabo’s mother and sisters. They were so excited to see us. We drove to Queens’s house to continue our joy and merriment. The next day, we went to see Uncle Ben and his family while Dabo’s mother went back to her house. We decided to stay in Queens’s place throughout our stay in Nigeria since it was in the heart of the town.

Two weeks later, on a Saturday morning, we were set to go and visit Dabo’s mother when the unexpected happened. Junior started vomitting and that got me worried. Junior and I had to stay back while Dabo, Queen and a cousin of theirs hired a taxi because Queen complained that she does not want to drive, aside that the road leading to their mother’s place is not tarred.

I started getting worried when it was about 9:30 p.m. and they had not returned. I know that my husband does not like to stay out late even in England. I tried all their numbers but none was reachable. I called his mother and she told me they left her place at about 6:30 p.m. She assured me that they will soon get home as the traffic was heavy in her area. I got a bit calm yet confused. Queen’s husband too assured me that they will soon get home because the last time he spoke with her, she said they were already on their way back home.

We waited all night but there was no sign of them. At about 8:00 a.m., I was trying to give Junior his medicine in the sitting room when we heard a knock on the door. Queen’s husband rushed to open the door only to see two policemen. They brought with them one of Queen’s business cards and asked him if he knew her. “Yes officers, she is my wife. What happened?” he asked. “I am sorry to say that the taxi they boarded ran into a stationary water tanker last night and all the occupants died. We saw this card in the purse of one of the women, however, we have taken their bodies to the mortuary but you need to come and identify their bodies,” announced one of the officers.

“Leo, what are the policemen saying?” I asked. When I did not hear any response, I hurried to the door and Leo gave me the bad news. Tears rolled down my cheeks. “Who have I offended?” I asked in tears. Leo tried to console me while I cried uncontrollably. When I was a little calm, we were taken to the mortuary. Immediately I sighted the lifeless body of my loving husband, I fainted. The next thing, I woke up on a hospital bed with Leo and a doctor standing by my bedside. “Thank God Sabina you have regained consciousness. But unfortunately, because of the shock you suffered, you lost the pregnancy,” said the doctor.

All I could do was cry while Leo and the doctor consoled me. “Sabina, don’t worry, everything will be alright. For how long will you cry? Take it easy before you fall sick and please think of your son,” he said. Immediately, I asked about my son. “I asked Gina to take him to her place since I was here most of the time with you. You have been unconscious for three days,” Leo said. I was discharged the next day.

Dabo’s family held a meeting and concluded that there was no need to keep their bodies in the mortuary for long so the decision was to bury them that weekend. We all attended the burial and I must say my uncle and his family showed me so much love and support. Even Leo who was also grieved showed me so much care and support as he handled everything like a man.

A day later, Dabo’s mother and two elders visited me at Leo’s place. And she gave me a shocker, something I never contemplated. When she saw me, she immediately went down on her knees and said, “My daughter, Saby please I am here to plead with you to leave Junior in Nigeria with me. As you know Dabo was my only son and I need my grandson to constantly console and remind me of him. I will take care of him and train him through school,” she pleaded.

I was surprised and shocked. I told her to get up but for a minute I could not fathom what gave her the courage to ask me to leave Junior with her. “Mama, please I don’t mean to be rude but that is not possible. Just like you want him to remind you of Dabo that is how I want him to also remind me of my dear husband. Junior is only two and half years old, aside that he is my only consolation. I have lost his father and my unborn child, so please let me return with my son. However, we will visit you from time to time,” I pleaded.

She got angry and started calling me all sorts of names and swore that she will ensure I don’t go back to England with Junior. Now the whole family sees me as the enemy. But how can I leave my only child whose father I love so much with a 65-year-old trader? What can she possibly offer him? I understand her plight but she has refused to understand mine too.

No matter what they think of me, I have made it very clear that I cannot leave him in Nigeria for anybody to train or take care of because he is my sole responsibility. He is also my life right now. Dabo’s mother is making so much trouble right now and the family said they would be holding a meeting to decide who should take care of Junior. One thing is certain: I will not go back without my son. Is this really fair to me?

The morning we were to travel for the burial, I developed fever all of a sudden. My mother was worried but my father advised that the nanny took me to the hospital and also looked after me. “Nanny, please take her to see the family doctor and take good care of her. We will be back in two days,” my dad said. Unfortunately, that was the last time I saw my family. Sometimes, I even tried to commit suicide, but I did not have the courage.