I have been deceived by a lover on Facebook

Many people do not know that special person they have in their life until they have lost him. It is even worse when it is too late. I hope young ladies would learn a lesson or two from my story.

My name is Uzezi. I am the eldest of three children. I have heard and also read a couple of articles where people found true love through the social network, facebook. Alan has been pestering me for some time, but I did not give him any answer because the distance was just too much. He is a business man based in Germany.


But in the last six months, two of my friends did not only find true love on facebook, they are both happily married to men of their dreams they met on facebook, so I decided to give him a chance. Just about three months ago, I was the chief bridesmaid for my friend, Justina.

Her wedding could simply be described as fantastic! It was simple yet classy. She met her husband on facebook and they dated for about nine months without seeing each other. They only communicated on phone and the only time he came to Nigeria, they headed straight to the altar. The young man is rich and handsome. He has taken her the United States where he resides.

Also another friend of mine, Liz got married about a month ago to her facebook boyfriend of about six months. Their wedding was the talk of the town. Fortunately, he is the son of a one-time ambassador and they are happy together. Although, I have a man who loves and adores me, I felt he was not well to do and cannot give me the kind of wedding I wanted. His name is Jasper. We have been dating for about three years and even fixed a date for our wedding.

He has really tried for my family, financially. He practically singlehandedly sent me and two siblings to school with his little salary. My mother likes him so much because of his kindheartedness. She is always looking forward to our wedding day because according to her, "I can never ask for a better son-in-law. Uzezi, this man truly loves you and I hope you will make him happy," she said.

Alan is so poetic with his words. Hmmm, this is my ideal man. He is so romantic and poetic. He is also rich and handsome," I said to myself. Every day, we talked for about three hours just to know each other better. As time went, he sent me money to start a business and also get an apartment in any area of my choice where we would stay after the wedding. At this point, I told my mother and siblings about Alan but they did not give their support. "Who is Alan? What about Gasper who has been here for us all these years. The man you met on facebook, do you know his family? Do you know if he has been lying to you? My daughter, stick to the man you can see and not the one that is miles apart," my mother warned.

"Mother, you should understand. I thought I loved Gasper but I realised that I don't. Look, Alan can refund him all his money if that is your fear. He is rich and well-to-do. Gasper will find another woman that would truly love him. I will tell him to forget about me, "I said. I told Gasper I was no longer interested in marrying him as I found my true love. He begged and cried but I told him it was over. "Uzezi, but we have already fixed a date for our wedding. What happens now?" he asked. "It is either you cancel it or look for someone to marry on that day," I emphasised.

When my family saw that I was serious about Alan, they agreed to support me but I should be prepared to face whatever consequences that may come with my decision. In no time, I met some members of his family and we fixed a date for our wedding and started making plans almost immediately.

To avoid shame and disgrace, my mother pleaded with Gasper to marry my younger sister, Sarah. "Sarah, you will not regret marrying Gasper. He is a good and kind-hearted man," my mother pleaded. "Mother, you don't have to beg me; I will marry him because I have always liked him as an elder brother," she said.

So, my younger sister took my place on that day. I went to their wedding reception just to see the calibre of people in attendance and the type of food and drinks that were served. I knew that was not what I wanted because it was just too dry. I knew my wedding with Alan would be the talk of the town. I only needed to wait for about two months to marry my love, Alan.

His family came to pay my bride price in his absentia; my aso-ebi for my friends and his family members is very beautiful and colourful. In fact everything is ready; it is only the arrival of the groom that is left. Alan came back a day to our traditional wedding day and went straight to his family house.

I was so eager to see my prince charming. So, I went to see him later that evening before the D day. It was so strange because I did not see any one that looked like him from his facebook picture and the ones he emailed to me. I became a bit confused because I was familiar with all the faces in the house except the one on the wheel chair. "Gloria, where is Alan? He called me that he had arrived Nigeria. I want to see my prince charming, I revealed.

She was just staring at me like does Uzezi know what she is talking about? I asked why she was staring at me and she said, "You mean you don't know Emeka or Alan as you call him? Haven't you seen his pictures before?Ó she asked. I brought out the picture I had and showed it to her.

She nodded her head, as if in pity and said, "You have been deceived. This is the picture of our late brother, Chidi who took Emeka to Germany," she revealed. She turned back and pointed to the man on the wheel chair. "That is Emeka or Alan, your husband." I collapsed and was revived immediately. Alan told me not to worry that he would take good care of me. "I will take good care of you. The fact that I am on wheel chair does not make me less a man. I love you and I am rich," he said.

"Why did you deceive me?I asked. He asked me if he had told me he was on wheel chair if I would have married him. So the only way to get me was to attract me with his late brother's picture. I can't go on with the traditional wedding even though my bride price has been paid.

My mother said I must go ahead with it because she warned me about any future consequences. I cannot remain with a man on wheel chair for the rest of my life. His family said I must marry him after all my bride price had been paid. All attempts to make them understand that he deceived me fell on deaf ears. What do I do?